Hard Decisions

Some decisions are easy.
Some decisions are hard.

I have to make some hard decisions.

In the end it all comes down to one question:
“Do I want to be where I am?”

And — after lots of pondering — the answer is surprisingly simple:
No!

The questions

Do I want to live in a country where …

  • … summer lasts about one week — it it’s not even hot?
  • … it is dark — and I mean really dark — 3-5 months every year?
  • … it is common courtesy to ignore each other as much as possible?

No!

Do I want to earn about 30-80% of what I would earn somewhere else?

No!

Do I want to work in a toxic environment where …

  • … my skills constantly degrade?
  • … my motiviation is gone the moment I enter the office?

No!

Do I want the feeling that …

  • … whatever I do doesn’t matter?
    Because it’s messed up so badly in other areas that even if I only deliver 1% of what I could I still outperform the others.
  • … nobody is listening to me?
    Because even if I have one of the highest levels of experience and the best — proven — track record of success
    I’ll always run into the “no invented here” wall.

No!

Do I want to work on games that …

  • … I feel bad to ask people to spend money on?
  • … I want to hide from my CV?
  • … I don’t want to play?

No!

The answer

No!

And now?

Now that I know that I’m not in the right place — what do I do next?

I have no idea,
but knowing that something needs to happen is always a good first step.
The insight is hard — the doing is usually easier. At least for me.

But how?

Really, I have no idea.
I guess having a long talk with my boss will be a good start;

And letting the headhunters know I am open for input aka job offers.

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